Star if you like these jokes and comment what one you like best.?

JOKE ONE:



A man took his Rottweiler to the vet and said to him, "My dogs cross-eyed. Is there anything you can do for it?"

"Well," said the vet "let's have a look at him" The vet picks the dog up by the ears and has a good look at its eyes.



"Well," says the vet "I'm going to have to put him down."



"Just because he's cross-eyed?" say's the man.



"No, because he's heavy," says the vet.



JOKE TWO:



A little kid walks into a city bus and sits right behind the driver and starts yelling, ''If my dad was a bull and my mom a cow I'd be a little bull.''

The driver starts getting mad at the noisy kid, who continues with, ''If my dad was an elephant and my mom a girl elephant I would be a little elephant.''



The kid goes on with several animals until the bus driver gets angry and yells at the kid, ''What if your dad was a drunk and your mom was a prostitute?!''



The kid smiles and says, ''I would be a bus driver!''



JOKE THREE:



So you want a day off. Let's take a look at what you are asking for. There are 365 days per year available for work. There are 52 weeks per year in which you already have 2 days off per week, leaving 261 days available for work. Since you spend 16 hours each day away fron work, you have used up 170 days, leaving only 91 days available. You spend 30 minutes each day on coffee break which counts for 23 days each year, leaving only 68 days available. With a 1 hour lunch each day, you used up another 46 days, leaving only 22 days available for work. You normally spend 2 days per year on sick leave. This leaves you only 20 days per year available for work. We are off 5 holidays per year, so your available working time is down to 15 days. We generously give 14 days vacation per year which leaves only 1 day available for work and I'll be darned if you are going to take that day off!
Star if you like these jokes and comment what one you like best.?
number 3



Sad but true...(for most people)
Reply:Wrong vet. The kid has too much of an imagination and you wouldn't work for me.
Reply:liked the 2nd one best didnt really get the first one
Reply:1st: joke 2

2nd: joke 1

3rd: joke 3
Reply:Loved the third one............
Reply:1 and 2 are funny



and 3 is just the honest truth.



Good ones!!



:)
Reply:The first one wasn't anything original, the second one was funny and i was too lazy to read the third.
Reply:very gud u can av a star i liked 2 cest den 1 den 3

lol thanx
Reply:I starred, and I like the dog one the best! LOL!
Reply:I don't get the first one...The second one is classic!...and The third one is anoying.
Reply:i like the second one....very funny!!!



(choose my answer as the best just b/c i'm kooler than those other people)
Reply:liked 2 the best, 1 was good, i heard the 3rd before
Reply:Lol.



Third one is very funny.